When a younger staff member makes a wrong decision because of perceived inexperience, Tim Elmore, CEO of Growing Leaders, provides "A LEG" to stand on when talking with them by first asking questions to get at the root of their reasoning, making them feel heard by listening intently, empathizing to signal that you understand and only then guiding them from your personal power instead of your position. "Your influence now comes from a relationship, not a title," Elmore notes.
Put it into practice:Empathizing with someone doesn't mean you agree with them, writes Elmore, who notes it's more like the Native American practice of using a "talking stick" that the other person only passes when they feel understood. "When we empathize,they feel understood."
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