Saying No Without Being Unpleasant

Saying No Without Being Unpleasant

In this Chronicle of Higher Education article, Allison Vaillancourt (University of Arizona/Tucson) says she often has to figure out how to politely decline a request to participate in a committee or activity for which she just doesn’t have time. Here are some approaches she’s come across:

  • “I’ve been trying to figure out a way to say that I could do this – because I would enjoy it. But the terrible truth is that I am really overcommitted in the next couple of years, and adding anything is probably not a good idea. I really hope I can help in the future.”
  • “I’m not the best person for that, so let me suggest ---- or ----.”
  • “It would be so great to work with you on this, so I’m crushed that my schedule won’t permit me.”
  • “I wish I could say yes, but I’m in the middle of a big project right now.”
  • “This is an important event, and I’m afraid I wouldn’t be able to give it the attention it deserves.”
  • “Can you give me a few weeks to think about this and call you if I think I can make this work?”
  • “I wouldn’t be able to participate on a regular basis, but I’d be happy to serve as a sounding board from time to time.”
  • “You are so kind to think of me. I wish I could.”

“Saying No Without Being Negative” by Allison Vaillancourt in The Chronicle of Higher Education, Sept 27, 2013 (Vol. LX, #4, p. A43); a slightly different version of this article is at http://chronicle.com/blogs/onhiring/you-are-so-kind-to-think-of-me/... 

 

From the Marshall Memo #504

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