Running an Anger-Management Group for Troubled Adolescents

In this helpful article in ASCA School Counselor, Debra Madaris Efird (a middle-school counselor in Concord, North Carolina) describes how she convenes and runs sessions to help students handle anger. 

• Screening – Efird distributes a needs assessment schoolwide that asks students to rate their feelings on a variety of topics. Students who self-identify as having a higher level of anger than their peers are invited to a preliminary meeting in which she explains that she will be convening small groups to work on anger management. “A few students will flare quickly, snarling ‘I don’t need anger management!’” says Efird. “Exactly.” She tells students that the groups will be voluntary (sighs of relief) and they’ll meet once a week for six weeks. She then has students complete an anger assessment survey and write at the bottom whether or not they are interested in being in a group. She uses the responses to form balanced groups of 8-10, and follows up with individual meetings with students whose surveys show a high level of anger but say they don’t want to participate.

• The first session – Efird goes over the schedule, agenda, parent permission, and ground rules (confidentiality, respect, not monopolizing the conversation, etc.) and then has students choose one of several large sheets of construction paper on the floor and write on it a brief story about how anger led them to do:

• Something stupid
• Something dangerous
• Something regrettable
• Something out of control
• Something that made me cry.

Students then stand on their sheet of construction paper (there can be more than one person on a sheet) and tell their story to the group – for example, “I bashed the windshield of my stepfather’s car with a golf club” and “I pushed my best friend off the porch, and she could have broken a bone.” Students then move to another sheet and write and tell a different story. Some students exaggerate and need to be reined in, but most of them “hear the negative power of their anger, and some admit the need for self-control,” says Efird. She closes with an anger-reducing exercise like taking several deep breaths together. There are always a few students who say they’ve tried that before and it didn’t work, but Efird emphasizes the benefit of calming yourself and buying time to make better decisions. 

• The second session – This time, Efird elicits stories about the costs and consequences of anger, if necessary referring back to the stories told the week before – monetary costs such as repair of damaged property, court costs, bail, and nonmonetary costs like damage to one’s reputation, disappointing parents, or bodily harm (like breaking your hand punching a wall). Efird concludes by having students write about their anger (they may use profanities) and then standing in a circle and ceremoniously tearing their papers into tiny pieces and dumping them in a trashcan. 

• The third session – Efird talks about the different levels of anger and has students rate their reaction to different scenarios: disappointed, annoyed, furious, or enraged. “Noting the distinctions helps them assess if their anger response is reasonable or appropriate for the situation,” she says. “In group discussion, they learn the same situation can elicit differing responses among their peers.” Students identify their top three anger triggers, discuss avoidant and confrontational anger, brainstorm ideal responses, and think about how to communicate their needs in an assertive manner. This session’s concluding anger-reducing tool is having a five-minute chat with a partner (chosen by drawing numbers) on the value of talking out an anger situation with a trusted friend. 

• The fourth session – Students focus on the feelings underlying their anger. Efird peels off a leaf from a head of cabbage while naming an anger-triggering situation, pauses, and reveals the feeling beneath that – hurt or fear of rejection. The cabbage is passed around and each student peels off a leaf and articulates the underlying feelings. Students say things like, “I get mad when my parents compare me to my much smarter brother” (jealousy or fear of not measuring up), or “I hate it when I am blamed by a teacher for something I didn’t do” (disappointment at being labeled a troublemaker or fear of being out of control). “For most of them,” says Efird, “this will be the first time they’ve attempted to explore the fears, hurts, disappointments, and losses that can be fueling their anger.” The closing anger-reducing technique for this session is taking a brisk walk inside or outside the school, “walking it out.”

• The fifth session – The theme this time is forgiveness, reading studies about its physical and mental-health benefits. Efird uses a current news story about someone forgiving a malefactor (“I could never do that!” a student will say), and then has students each draw a piece of paper from a basket and respond to a statement, including:

• Forgiving is an act of kindness to ourselves, not to the person we forgive.
• Forgiving means being willing to forgive ourselves, too.
• Forgiving may not necessarily lead to restoration of a relationship.

The closing activity this time is closing their eyes and imagining they are walking on a beach.

• The last session – Efird reviews the discussions from each of the preceding meetings, focusing especially on the anger-reducing techniques used at the end. “Encourage them to keep searching for healthy anger-reducing activities that work for them,” she says. “In closing, remind them that anger is a normal emotion that will pop up in their lives (and yours) over and over again. Just because they have completed anger-management group counseling does not guarantee wise responses in future anger incidents.” But you’ve provided practical tools for self-regulation and a foundation on which to build their skills for understanding and dealing with difficult situations throughout their lives. The last word: you’re available in crisis situations. Before they leave, students fill out an evaluation.

“Address Adolescent Anger” by Debra Madaris Efird in ASCA School Counselor, November/December 2013 (Vol. 51, #2, p. 22-27), www.schoolcounselor.org; Efird can be reached at debra.efird@cabarrus.k12.nc.us. 

From the Marshall Memo #516