In an intriguing 2022 study, 250 children aged 10–16 years heard prerecorded directives from teachers—“I’m waiting for people to quiet down” or “It’s time to tidy up all of your belongings,” for example—delivered in varying tones of voice, which the researchers classified as warm and supporting, neutral, or controlling.

The study concluded that a controlling tone of voice negatively affected a wide range of desirable classroom qualities, from cooperation to sharing, well-being, and sense of belonging. Kids exposed to the controlling tone took it to heart: They were less likely to reach out to teachers to share triumphs or seek help with problems, researchers noted.

Not every pointed phrase should be second-guessed; everyone loses their cool. But when teachers prepare for class by imagining how they might respond calmly to a disruption or a frustrating request to repeat instructions, as educator Pernille Ripp advises in a recent Edutopia article, they set themselves up to create learning environments that better support students’ needs. What’s more, controlling voices “failed to achieve what they set out to do—ensure the child’s compliant behavior,” according to the researchers.