Dealing with Students’ Sexualized Behavior in the Classroom

In this helpful Kappan article, Nancy Rappaport (Harvard Medical School) and Jessica Minahan (Newton, MA Public Schools behavior analyst) offer suggestions for understanding and teaching students who exhibit sexualized behavior (for example, sexual language, gestures, or noises, inappropriately touching others, or classroom masturbation). “These behaviors are relatively rare,” say Rappaport and Minahan, “but can be very upsetting to teachers, who often don’t know what to do… Most schools have a zero-tolerance policy for sexualized behavior. However, some consequences of these policies can accidentally reinforce the unwanted behavior, re-victimize students with trauma histories as they receive harsh punishments for behaviors they don’t understand, or reinforce an adversarial child-authority dynamic… An appropriate teacher response (with support from school mental health staff) and therapy can help them learn to respect personal boundaries, form healthy relationships, and function better in school.” 

According to Rappaport and Minahan, three main factors are linked to sexualized behavior in young people:

• Social skills deficits – These students have trouble understanding others’ body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice and conforming to the unwritten, nonverbal rules of social interaction. They may be on the autism spectrum, including Asperger syndrome. Or their actions may stem from an attempt to attract attention or be a way of expressing anger and frustration. Students with social skills deficits may not understand the emotional impact of their actions on others.

• Impulsiveness – These students act and blurt out before they think and may have severe attention deficit disorder. “While impulsive students don’t control themselves in the moment,” say Rappaport and Minahan, “they can usually process the incident later and feel remorse… They need instruction in self-regulation, not social skills.” They also need close supervision.

• Previous sexual abuse – “When students experience sexual trauma and have their sense of personal safety violated, the effect can be long-lasting and devastating,” say Rappaport and Minahan. “All children who have experienced sexual abuse should undergo a psychological evaluation and may need ongoing counseling.” That said, most victims of sexual abuse don’t develop sexualized behaviors (their symptoms are usually more subtle), and children who exhibit sexualized behaviors don’t necessarily have a history of sexual abuse. Teachers should “stay curious” about what causes sexualized behaviors and not make assumptions. But if there is clear evidence of abuse, educators are mandated reporters and need to follow school protocol and report to child protection services. 

How should teachers and other staff respond to sexualized student behavior? The goal is to draw as little public attention to the behavior as possible, hide one’s personal distaste or distress, and make clear that a rule was broken and a consequence is forthcoming – for example, “That is inappropriate. You lost extra time on the computer”, or removing the child from the classroom with as little talk as possible. For students who have proficient writing skills, the teacher might ask them to answer questions like: How did my behavior make others feel? What did I want from this behavior? Did I get what I wanted? What was a better way to get attention?

Accommodations and modifications can help change these students’ behavior while addressing underlying deficits, and help traumatized students communicate their distress in different ways. Some examples:

• Personal space – Separation between students’ desks and spacing students on carpets and when lining up can reduce problems. 
• Vigilance – Adult supervision is important at recess, in the cafeteria, and in bathrooms. Students with sexualized behaviors may need to have permission to use a staff or nurse’s bathroom.
• Self-regulation – These students can be taught to recognize when they are becoming agitated or are about to cross the line to inappropriate conduct and have a strategy for taking a break or moving to a special spot in the classroom.
• Interaction – There’s a danger of sexualized student behaviors provoking negative adult responses, creating a cycle that’s hard to break. “Making any student feel embarrassed about sexualized behavior is unproductive and invites shame,” say Rappaport and Minahan. “Students who feel that they’re bad are more likely to engage in negative attention-seeking or rule-breaking behavior.” They recommend being systematic about positive interactions and also, when a student is showing signs of becoming agitated, setting a timer and saying you’ll be back in two minutes to check in. When these students behave appropriately and achieve, positive reinforcement is important. However, staff members should be cautious about hugs since they may not know what triggers traumatic memories. They may want to work out a personalized handshake or “hand hug” with the student. 

“‘I Didn’t Mean to…’ Practical Suggestions for Understanding and Teaching Students with Sexualized Behavior” by Nancy Rappaport and Jessica Minahan in Phi Delta Kappan, February 2013 (Vol. 94, #5, p. 21-26), www.kappanmagazine.org

From the Marshall Memo #472