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Cracking the Code of “Push & Love” Leadership
Dan Rockwell
Leadership Freak
January 7, 2025
Source: Nick Tasler, January 7, 2025.
Change is a constant in leadership, and the most effective leaders balance maintaining high standards with providing strong support—an approach known as "Push & Love" leadership. This strategy stands apart from more common styles, such as “Hug & Love” (focused on emotional support at the expense of standards) and “Push & Shove” (emphasizing results with little regard for team well-being). By integrating high expectations with high empathy, Push & Love leaders cultivate resilience, trust, and long-term success.
Effective leaders acknowledge mistakes without dwelling on them. A notable example is Microsoft’s response to the 2014 failure of its AI chatbot, Tay. When the bot was hijacked to spread harmful content, CEO Satya Nadella accepted responsibility while encouraging the engineering team to continue innovating. His support led to the development of Zo, a bot that positioned Microsoft as a leader in AI. The lesson for educators is clear: Accept setbacks as learning opportunities, but continue to set ambitious goals for your team or students.
Push & Love leaders balance honesty about current challenges with optimism about future possibilities. This approach mirrors Franklin D. Roosevelt’s famous speech during the Great Depression. Before declaring, “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself,” he acknowledged the dire state of the economy. Educators can adopt a similar strategy by providing a clear-eyed assessment of student performance or school challenges, followed by highlighting the potential for improvement and success.
Transparency is critical when giving feedback. Studies show that people often interpret criticism as a sign of personal inadequacy. To counter this, leaders should explicitly communicate their belief in the individual’s potential. For example, a teacher might say, “I’m offering this feedback because I see how capable you are and want to help you achieve your best.” This clarity helps foster trust and motivates individuals to rise to higher expectations.
In the Classroom:
Teachers can apply Push & Love principles by addressing academic or behavioral challenges directly while affirming students’ capacity for growth. For instance:
For School Leaders:
Principals and administrators navigating school-wide change can model Push & Love by:
During Change:
Educational environments often face significant transitions, such as curriculum updates or technology integration. Leaders who use Push & Love can guide teams through these changes by balancing accountability with support.
Push & Love leadership is an adaptable approach that combines high expectations with unwavering support. By accepting past failures, clarifying current challenges, and transparently fostering potential, educators can inspire resilience and achievement in their teams and students. This method exemplifies how effective leadership can transform periods of uncertainty into opportunities for growth and success.
Source: Tasler, N. (2025, January 7). Cracking the Code of “Push & Love”
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Prepared with the assistance of AI software
OpenAI. (2024). ChatGPT (4) [Large language model]. https://chat.openai.com
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