As teachers and administrators seek new ways to prevent bullying and harassment in our classrooms, we are turning more and more to the power that lies in the majority of our students, the bystanders. As our largest resource, they are nei- ther bully nor victim; however, they provide the audience for the interaction between these two “players.” If given the right training, these actors in the theater of bullying can join forces, strip the negative power from the bully, and working as a team of “allies” for the victim, change the culture of our schools.

We are teaching children strategies to stand up for them- selves and to intervene when they feel their classmates are being treated unfairly. We ask them to use “I” messages to let others know how they feel, and expect them to empathize with others when they are excluded or called names. We teach them the dangers of spreading rumors and damaging the rep- utations of their friends.

It is important that our teachers stress “upstanding behav- iors” to their students and that they model the same behaviors they are preaching. In addition, it is important that the parents of our students understand the strategies their children learn and model the same behaviors in their daily lives. It would be naïve to think that teaching these behaviors without providing adult role models to emulate will have any value.

Psychological theory tells us that “imprinting” behavior is the result of environmental conditioning in which children learn from adult behaviors and lessons taught to them. Children tend to adopt the values and ideals of their adult role models – first their parents, and next their teachers.1

In order for bullying to occur, there must be what is de- scribed as an imbalance of power and a desire to be in control of a situation. In addition, behaviors must occur repeatedly

and over time. In many cases, a person with bullying behaviors wants the approval of the bystander as an audience.2

It is important that school leaders train their teachers in the characteristics of bullying because the nature of a teacher’s position may inadvertently lead them to exhibit bullying be- haviors in their classrooms. Clearly (in most cases), it is not the intent of a teacher to intimidate students. However, with the pressure of high-stakes testing, new common core standards, and evaluations based on test scores, the perfect storm is created. Teachers are, by definition, in a position of power and have unlimited access to their students, making it easy to repeat their behaviors over time. Filling the classroom with children automatically provides an audience of “bystanders.” The ability to grade or rate their students adds to this power. In order to help in our schools’ attempts to eliminate bullying, it must be understood that leading our children by intimidation will not be successful.

By understanding the nature of bullying, and adhering to the concepts we are teaching about “upstanding” behaviors, it is imperative that our classroom teachers display exemplary behaviors, ones that support a climate of caring, understand- ing, and trust. Giving children an opportunity for choice in their assignments, creating bonds and positive relationships with them, encouraging caring friendships between them, and finding ways to highlight students’ individual strengths will support any bullying prevention initiative.