Can a Leader Be Effective and Liked?

In this Chronicle of Higher Education article, Allison Vaillancourt (University of Arizona/Tucson) describes how two new academic honchos in her university have been making bold changes without the usual moaning and groaning from the troops. When Vaillancourt described this puzzling phenomenon to a friend, the response was, “If no one is pushing back, they clearly aren’t pushing hard enough.” This was an expression of the conventional wisdom that leaders can’t be both liked and effective at the same time. 

But Vaillancourt disagrees. She believes it’s possible for a leader to bring about significant change (leading to genuine respect) without being unpopular. How? By “helping others see the need for change, attending to individual and group dynamics, honoring cultural traditions, and creating optimism about the future rather than fear of what might happen if others don’t go along.” In addition, she says, successful leaders create a reservoir of good will, build good relationships, and persuade people to follow them. Dwight Eisenhower’s definition of leadership is right up her alley: “Getting people to do the right thing because they want to.”

So what about leaders who are effective and disliked? Vaillancourt says it’s because they’re genuinely unlikable – that is, mean-spirited, nasty, tyrannical, narcissistic, self-serving, and feared – and make no effort to be otherwise. In the end, this attitude will come back to bite them. The real question, she says, is, “Do you want to be effective in the short term or effective in the long term?” 

Of course all leaders have to make decisions or act in ways that are not popular. “But if the relationship is built on trust and open communication, then members of the organization will understand why the decision was made,” says Vaillancourt. “They may not like the decision or the outcome, but they can still like and respect the person who made that decision.” Here’s what good leaders do to get things done while maintaining warm and positive relationships:

• Ask a lot of questions.
• Talk like normal people.
• Act like normal people.
• Show vulnerability from time to time. 
• Propose a solution, ask if it makes sense, and then revise it if necessary.
• Don’t assume they have the best ideas.
• Make collaboration the rule, not the exception.
• Expect the best of others.
• Say “thank you” often.
• Don’t throw people under the bus even if they might deserve it.
• Give away credit.
• Recognize that they are still growing as leaders and actively seek to get better.
• Call out people who do bad/mean things.
• Make hard choices even when it would be easier to avoid them. 

“Would You Rather Be Liked or Effective?” by Allison Vaillancourt in The Chronicle of Higher Education, Nov. 23, 2012 (Vol. LIX, #23, p. A32), 

http://chronicle.com/blogs/onhiring/would-you-rather-be-liked-or-ef...

From the Marshall Memo #462